Fat Shaming People

I was out with a friend shopping yesterday in Madoc Ontario.
We went out to find some clothing that will fit me.

Over the last few years I have been unable to control my weight gain and have an extra 80 pounds on my frame.
I always have had to watch what I eat ( I eat healthy) .
I have a terrible time dealing with my poor body image thanks to being teased as a child and teen about my weight.
After being so careful about my weight it was heart breaking to watch the weight gain and being unable to do anything about it.
I have a thyroid disorder that is not yet under control, I have medication adjustments every three months and will until my blood levels are satisfactory to my doctor.

Back to the shopping incident...

I was in a store with my friend and mentioned that my capris were falling down I said I didn't think they were too tight maybe just a bit loose, then a woman I was not even speaking to piped up " Well you need to lose weight and are just not willing to admit it or do anything about it!"
As she pushed by me with a disgusted look on her face.
Not only was I shocked that she said this I was hurt.
I know what I look like and can't stand even looking at myself , I hate getting dressed each day and shopping for clothes both of these things drive me to tears on a good day.
I went out that day due to being upset and needing something that fit and my friend was trying to cheer me up.
Very hard to go from a size 10 to a size 22 (3x) and have everyone judge you when you eat or drink anything or just by walking by them these days.
I never said a word to that woman standing there judging me on my appearance as I know I would have cried (too sensitive? I can't seem to help it, as this was not the first insult of the day I had shot my way.)


I am crying as I am writing this post and didn't sleep all night thinking of how rude she was and mad that I didn't say something back to her  and hating myself even more.
I didn't find anything to fit that would hide my belly so I have to go out again and the prospect of that is making me ill just thinking of it.

How do I learn to harden my heart to all the hateful, hurtful comments I have had directed at me as of late?
Even when my meds level my blood out, I still have the task of losing all of this weight which seems hopeless.

I find I am struggling just to get up each day as I hate to have to find something to wear and try to face the world .
How do I deal with this?
I pray daily for the Lord to heal me and I stick to a strict diet and the doctor tells me I don't eat enough...very hard to want to eat when I know I have to try to fit into my dress tomorrow...again.

I can't even walk video

 What a beautiful video I just had to share with you all today.

I Can't  Even Walk
Posted by Carmen Gainey Hodge on Sunday, July 19, 2015

Drive-in Opens This Weekend!

The Havelock Family Drive-in opens this weekend for the season and I am so excited!
I have my beautiful little earth angel for the weekend and  there is going to be  a child appropriate movie on and  I plan on taking her to her first drive-in movie!

The movies they are playing this weekend are Home, this is the child friendly movie about an alien on the run the stops by Earth sounds cute!

Furious 7 is also on as well as Unfriended.

I imagine she will be sleeping before the end of the first movie so will bring be able to watch the other two movies if I can stay awake lol.

Havelock Country Jamboree, The Ranch Resort and CKOL Radio

I had the pleasure of seeing some great talent at the Ranch Resort In Bethany, in the months of February and March for the Next Country Music Star Search Talent Contest.
Each week the acts that were seen were judged and winners were sent through and it was a difficult task judging the talent but in the end there could only be 3 winners going to play 3 different venues.
Below is what was on the  Havelock Country Jamboree's and the Ranch Resort's websites about the talent search contest.

The judges declared Instant Rivalry the first place WINNERS of The Next Country Music Star Talent Show. They receive:

• A one hour stage performance, Friday August 14th, 1pm, at the 2015 Havelock Country Jamboree.

• From Metalworks Production Company, a 1 day Studio Session to record an original song of choice with a producer and engineer at Metalworks Recording Studios valued at $5,000.
• From Heather Ostertag & Associates, a one day “Strategy Planning Session”.

The value of this package is $1,500.

• A 3 hour photo shoot from Anita Bell with 12 finished and edited photos, and with full artist rights to use the photos.
• A TW-JF Tanglewood Java Series Guitar, donated by The Guitar Boutique, PETERBOROUGH & Whitby.

Second Place WINNER, Henry Norwood, receives:

• A  full spot on stage at 2015 Marmora Fall Jamboree.
• A ½ hr set at the 2015 Havelock Country Jamboree on Sunday August 16th starting at 1:45pm.

Third Place WINNER, James Barker Band, receives: 

• A spot on stage at 2015 RPM Recreation & Performance Motor Show.
• A ½ hr set at the 2015 Havelock Country Jamboree on Friday August 14th at 12:15pm

In addition, Kaitlin Kozell has been invited to sing the National Anthem at the opening night of the 2015 Havelock Country Jamboree and Kansas Stone has been invited to be part of the line-up for the 2016 Havelock Country Jamboree.

More offers are continuing to be developed, so that all finalists and many other CONTESTANTS of The Next Country Music Star Talent Search will be given a chance to perform at prestigious summer jamboree festivals around Ontario. Please keep following the website or Facebook/The Next Country Music Star for continued updates.

Thanks to the CONTESTANTS, the judges, and all the sponsors & supporters of The Next Country Music Star Talent Search. Many thanks to Andy Tough of RMS Events for videotaping the semi-final and final performances and most importantly thanks to the audience. All of your enthusiastic support made it a huge success!

https://youtu.be/u76s-Yq75Cg   -Instant Rivalry

https://youtu.be/8kGktdmK41M -Henry Norwood

https://youtu.be/s9c2iRsJxus -James Barker Band

I had such a great time there,not only was The Ranch Resort a beautiful place , the staff was very friendly and the service was great...the food and entertainment was spectacular!

I look forward to interviewing more of these talented performers on CKOL radio 93.7 FM / 100.7 Fm

I definitely look forward to seeing more talent at the Ranch Resort, The Havelock Country Jamboree,

The Marmora Fall Jamboree and of course the RPM Recreation and Performance Motor Show!

Loving The Sunshine

I try to spend some time out in the sunshine each day , it is not only mood enhancing it is so nice to see after such a dreary month of April we have had.

I have two squirrels that come and get fed each day one is a mama squirrel we named Twitch.
Twitch has the twitchiest tail I have ever seen on a squirrel.
The other is a sweet little squirrel I started feeding last fall, he was always getting beat up and robbed of his food by the other squirrels, he is always alone.
He has been coming up and  eating out of my hand for the last month or two.
He stays right at the door and eats his treat each day knowing that as long as I am there no other squirrel will bother him.
I named this squirrel Sad Sack...he looks just as sad as can be.
I make clicking noises and no matter where he is he comes running to see what I have for him today.

Do any of you have a little critter that comes to be fed?

Snowing again!

It has been snowing off and on all morning and I know there are some pretty unhappy people out there but I figure that we should appreciate each day given to us even if the you aren't happy about the weather you should be happy that you are given this day to live and love and heck, yes laugh too!
I thank God each and every morning for giving me another day to walk this earth.
I will take that rain, shine or snow!

The Best Tomato Soup !

I am not feeling very well today and my body is telling me that I need to eat and the only thing that even sounds appetizing is my homemade tomato soup.
I know I have shared my recipe with you a few years ago but it is still my favourite and worth sharing again.


Cream of Tomato Soup

3 cups peeled, chopped tomatoes (2 large cans of Marsala tomatoes in winter)
2 cups of water 1 small minced onion
2 cloves minced garlic
1- 5 1/2 ounce can of tomato paste
2 teaspoons of sugar
2 teaspoons of salt
1/2 teaspoon of basil leaves dried or 1/2 stalk of fresh basil chopped fine
1/4 teaspoon ground thyme
a pinch of pepper
mix together and bring to boil stirring occasionally
reduce heat and simmer 10 minutes
In small saucepan make white sauce with 2 tablespoons butter, 2 tablespoons flour and 1 cup of milk or cream
once made add a ladle of the tomato mixture and mix together then gradually add white sauce to hot tomato mixture stirring constantly.
Once heated through, serve and enjoy!